You Just Don’t Know...
Until you have one of your own.
by AnnMarie Evola
PARENTGUIDE NEWS DECEMBER 2005
Just a few months ago, I became a parent for the first time. No matter
how much you think you can prepare mentally to travel down the hall-ways
of this unknown territory, you will never know what you are in for until
you head home with your baby in tow. Walking out of the hospital, holding
my husband’s hand as he held the car seat in which our brand-new
son sat, I felt trepidation, nervousness, fear, elation, happiness and
excitement. What I thought to myself was, “Wow, we are NOW a family.”
With only close to three months of experience as a Mom, there are
already things that I thought I knew before, but have now taken on a
whole new meaning:
I thought I knew what pain was, until I found myself praying and begging
for the delivery to be over.
I thought I knew excitement, until the doctors and nurses yelled out
“It’s a BOY!”
I thought I knew fear, until I experienced the seconds, that felt more
like hours, before my son’s first cry.
I thought I knew what being tired felt like, until I spent the whole
night staring at a sleeping baby, focusing on the up and down movement
of his small chest.
I thought I knew how to tell time, until all of a sudden I didn’t
have any.
I thought I knew how good a shower can make you feel, until I took one
after two long days of not even being able to wash my face.
I thought I knew what a month was, until I found myself in complete
bewilderment as my husband and I celebrated my son’s first month
of life.
I thought I knew what joy was, until I saw my son’s first smile.
I thought I knew what cuddling was, until my son wrapped his arms around
me and nuzzled his face into my neck.
I thought I knew what love was, until I saw my little man sleeping soundly
on my husband’s chest.
I thought I knew what family was, until I had one of my own.
As parents, my husband and I are sure to mess up from time to time—
I can guarantee that. But I do hope that in this lifelong journey together
we give our son enough love and respect so that he becomes a good person
with good values. I wish for him to be honest, but not gullible; aggressive,
but not pushy; successful, but not greedy; funny, but not at the expense
of others. I wish for him to be happy, but not unable to handle sadness;
know uncomplicated, real love; but not complicated, real heartbreak;
and to always know the importance and wonder of family!
AnnMarie Evola is the editor of PARENTGUIDE News.